Craxy Rogue
by willa. j
Summary: Chapter 4. the professor finally get his big suprise. main characters: Rogue, Remy, and Bobby
1. Default Chapter

Disclaimer: I own nothing. Isn't that obvious.  
  
Thinking "Talking" Other  
  
Rogue hit her head and is in the Med. Lab.  
  
"Wee, go blue fish go!"  
  
Remy walks down the hallway and heard Rogue. "What the hell?" Remy then peaks into the room. "Cherie, Remy wants to know, who are you talking to?"  
  
"The fish aren't they pretty." She replies looking like she high as a kite.  
  
"Remy can't see the fish."  
  
"Well duh, They're invisible and they think your funny lookin'."  
  
"Okay Cherie give Remy some time and they won't think he's funny lookin'."  
  
"Ah think they still will think yer funny lookin'. Cause ah think yer funny lookin'."  
  
"Cherie you wound Remy."  
  
"And yer point being?"  
  
"Remy thinks you're a belle femme."  
  
"Well thank yah Remy. I still think yer funny lookin'."  
  
"Come on Remy knows there's a way to change your mind."  
  
"Nope!"  
  
That went well. "Cherie Remy wonders if fish don't talk, how do you understand them?" Good job Remy. What the hell kind of question was that?  
  
"Well that simple silly, the fish talk in bubble code." Meanwhile rogue is humming songs in her head having a good time.  
  
"Oh." Merde that bump on her head is worse than Remy thought.  
  
Rogue gets up and walks toward the door where Remy is standing.  
  
"Cherie, Remy wants to know where your goin'." because Remy wants to come too.  
  
"Ah'm going tah mah room because the bed is too hard and I hate it down here."  
  
"Fine cherie, mind if Remy walks you to your room?"  
  
"Nah. Go ahead. Just no funny stuff Swamp Rat."  
  
"Remy would never do anything to hurt his cherie." Remy thinks don't think this is a really good idea. But Mr. McCoy isn't here and ma cherie seems to be getting worse. Plus, I get to watch her all the way up to her room and she isn't even protestin'. 


	2. more rogue and remy

Disclaimer: I own nothing, nothing. Go away!  
  
Thanks for the reviews- you made my day.  
  
This chapter is really not that good but I had to update. I'm sorry for the long wait but I'm having a lot of difficulty with this story if you have any ideas tell me please. Because I can probably put up one more chapter then my brain is going to evaporate or if you want to take over the story that's okay, too.  
  
Oh, and by the way it was not supposed to be Craxy Rogue it was a spelling error. But it kinda makes more sense than my other title. ---------------------------------------------------------------------------- ------------------------------ YESTERDAY AFTERNOON  
  
All the students were lounging around in the rec. room sort of. You know hanging out, listening to music, singing horribly while listening to music, annoying each other, and just having an all round great time, well almost everyone.  
  
"Bobby like if you don't like stop that I'm going to like tell the professor!" Kitty screamed as she ran through the rec. room and into the hallway.  
  
"You just do that pretty kitty." Bobby smirked his plan was working perfectly.  
  
Wham. Bobby just connected with Logan and the Canadian was not happy.  
  
"Er Hi Logan. Bye Logan" Bobby was out of there in a flash and that was a good thing too because the canadian was not in a good mood at all.  
  
Logan growls and mumbles "Damn teenagers." He was now on his way to the bar –not like he needed a real reason but the kids were enough. He needed some time away from everything especially the hormonal teenagers and their sick jokes. That's why they were going to get a very early wake up call tomorrow morning.  
  
Somewhere down the hall kitty can be heard, "Bobby Drake, YOU'RE A DEAD MAN!"  
  
"Yah think that boy would of thought of a better plan after he got Kitty than to just run. She can be pretty scary." Rogue smirked. She would love to see Bobby in a cast of any sort for a while keep him away from all his peculiar devices and the giggling girls. They really got on Rogues nerves.  
  
Off in the corner was the famous Remy Lebeau talking about who know what all you'd really notice and all Rogue really did notice was that the girls were all drooling visibly and it was disgusting. The guy had a big enough ego, as it was he doesn't need them to boost it especially when Rogue tried to break it down. Although, it didn't really work she liked fighting with him. This was only when she won of course, of course.  
  
"Cherie, Remy thinks you should come and sit by him while we watch a scary movie." Remy says while staring at Rogue.  
  
"Ah don't think there is anything more frightening than you Swamp Rat and what about the gaggle of girls you have drooling all over you. What will yah ever do with them all?" was Rogues sarcastic reply.  
  
"Awe jealous cherie you are always number one to Remy." Remy replies with his cocky smirk plastered in place.  
  
"Ah am not jealous, just worried about my upchuck reflex kicking in anytime soon. Why don't yah come ovah here so I can work on mah aim." Rogue replies hastily while getting up and stretching. She can't take anymore of this nonsense. She has decided to go and find Kitty and help dissect Bobby. Poor man, NOT! She starts walking over to the door.  
  
"Cherie Remy wants to know where you are going?" Remy asks.  
  
Rogue nearly jumps as she turns around damn Cajun and his sneakiness. "None of yah business Swamp Rat."  
  
"Remy just going to half to follow his cherie, or you could tell Remy where you are going." Remy again just smirks, again.  
  
"Ah am going to fahnd Kitty to help her kill Bobby and if yah don't stop being such an ass then you will soon be in tha same category as Bobby. So, back off!"  
  
By now the couple are in the hallway making their way to Rogue and Kitty's room. Rogue is getting agrier by the second she does not need an annoying cocky Cajun asshole to be her Guardian- that's what Logan is for- mental note to Rogue: Get Logan to kill Remy very soon...  
  
"Go away now I told yah were ah was going."  
  
"Ah but cherie Remy said nothing about leavin'"  
  
Damn Damn Damn Damn. Rogue felt like jumping off a cliff but with her guardian. I'm sure she wouldn't even make it of the cliff and she would end up in his arms. Gross! Meanwhile Remy was still talking but Rogue didn't care as long as it wasn't about her or anything related to never mind you don't want to know, trust me.  
  
"Do you ever shut up?" Rogue wonders aloud.  
  
"No is Remy supposed to stop talking?" Remy gleefully says.  
  
"Yes! Do ya half ta be an ass all tha time?" Rogue roars.  
  
"Like I think he'd reply in the negative." Kitty retorts from just down the hallway. Her hair is a mess and she looks like a tornado just went through. "Did Remy miss something, petite." Remy knew too well what she was doing it was just so fun to tease her.  
  
"No, I wasn't like doing anything." Kitty replies  
  
"Raht Kitty whatever yah say and what did you do with Bobby"  
  
"You'll like see." Kitty grins evilly as Kurt walks up behind her.  
  
"Boo!" Kurt yells really loud  
  
Of course Kitty would not take to well to this and the fact that she almost phased through the wall didn't help any.  
  
"There goes the neibourhood."  
  
"But cherie we live in a house and Remy thinks Kitty's the only one going bonkers"  
  
"Yah have a lot to learn Cajun"  
  
"And Remy can start his tutorial right now cherie. So what you going to teach Remy first. Stripping 101, maybe the art of kissing, or-"  
  
WHAM  
  
"Maybe Remy should keep his perverted dreams tah himself."  
  
"But Remy likes to see your face when you get mad it makes it all the more fun."  
  
"That's it Ah need a break, FROM YAH. Ahm going tah find Bobby Alone and if ah find you following me in any shape or form your also a dead man got it."  
  
"No problem cherie." Remy replies with a smirk and fingers crossed. 


	3. Bobby and the plan

Disclaimer" I own nothing. What's new. I'm really working hard but I can't seem to end this stoopid joke.  
  
Rogue has tried to find Bobby for hours and what does she come up with nothing. What could Kitty have possibly done? She tromps back into the rec. room only to see a red-eyed Cajun waiting. "What did you do?"  
  
"Nothing cherie."  
  
"Like hell. Where's Bobby?"  
  
"Are you really sure you want to know?"  
  
"YES!!"  
  
"Hey Rogue what's up?" Bobby replies from the chair.  
  
Damn why me. Ah always half to do thing the hard way.  
  
"Cherie you come all the way back to cuddle with Remy."  
  
"No go away." Rogue says while making her way to the couch.  
  
"But all Remy want to do was help."  
  
"You can help by going away."  
  
"Non."  
  
Rogue has closed her eyes she hasn't slept very well in forever and just maybe she's falling asleep. Remy starts massaging her feet and she drifts away. But all to soon Bobby turns around and replies.  
  
"How sweet, look at the two love birds."  
  
That was all it took, Rogue stood bold upright and glared at the Cajun while getting funny looks from a lot of the kids.  
  
"Well cherie Remy did think you were getting a little comfortable."  
  
"No Ah wasn't."  
  
"Remy thinks you were."  
  
"Well Ah didn't know Remy could think."  
  
"Okay, you two break it up. How about we put your anger into more resourceful purposes like playing a prank on the professor."  
  
"No, and secondly how could you pull a prank on the professor he's a telepath?"  
  
"That's all been taken care of my dear Rogue now will you sit down and consider my offer."  
  
"No."  
  
"Remy thinks she just wants to go up to Remy's Room and play some games, oui?"  
  
"Now, what kind of prank are we talking about Bobby?"  
  
"I like it when you do that Remy."  
  
"Remy thinks she'll come around but until then you know what they say, All fair in love and war."  
  
"Damn Cajun, knew I was set up." Rogue grumbles.  
  
"Too late you ain't getting out of this one Rogue." Bobby gloats.  
  
"Can we get this over with ah have somewhere tah be."  
  
"Where cherie on the couch with Remy?"  
  
Rogue lunges at Remy and just as she was about to connect with his right lip he grabs her hand. Rogue ends up lying on top of Remy. Remy is pleased and Rogue is struggling to get free.  
  
"Remy thinks you shouldn't be doing that cherie you know how Remy can be." Remy whispers in Rogue's ear. Rogue turns beat red and stops immediately. How can she now know what he is talking about he is Remy after all.  
  
Bobby was watching the whole thing thoroughly and was about to comment when Kitty does, "So, like are you guys going out now."  
  
Rogue immediately says NO and Remy just smirks. She can't get away. What a good day he is having. Rogue then whispers in his ear, "And if you tell her anything else you will not live to see the light of day."  
  
"So, cherie Remy going to live with you all his life indoors? Sounds good to Remy."  
  
Rogue just huffs and shuts her eye this is going to be a very long day.  
  
"I like think she likes you Remy."  
  
"Remy know ma cherie likes him." "Aww that's so sweet."  
  
"Nawt. Kitty I could use some help here."  
  
"Like no. Just call it payback."  
  
"For what?"  
  
"Oh, I'll think of somehting."  
  
"Good lawd."  
  
"Okay you kiddies are you all done yet. We have business to attend to."  
  
"Can I like help?"  
  
"Kitty you just want to know the details so you can tell jubilee and all the others."  
  
"So, can't blame a girl for like wanting to like stay in the loop can you."  
  
"Well anyway I think we should all have code names so nobody will know who pulled the prank."  
  
"Oh goodie lets all be idiots together. Ah am not going to have a code name got it."  
  
"I will call you whatever you want ma cherie." Remy whispers in Rogue's ear.  
  
"Well then stop calling me cherie."  
  
"Non." Rogue just rolls here eyes she needs some help if only Logan where here.  
  
"Okay high and mighy leader what do are yahre codes names gonna be."  
  
"Remy be the Rajun Cajun"  
  
"And how is that a code name again? Everybody with half a brain could guess it was you."  
  
"Cherie you know Remy thinks that's not nice. Why are you being so mean to Remy?"  
  
"Because Your Cherie hate you!"  
  
"Cherie you wound Remy."  
  
"Will you two stop flirting already your giving me a headache. Will you two just make out already your giving me a headache." Kitty just starts giggling.  
  
"One problem stick less Popsicle king mah powers."  
  
"Give me a break. Remy could find a way past anything."  
  
"You know cherie Remy thinks popsicle boy has a point. Remy can think of a lot of things of the top of his head." Remy whispers only to Rogue. Rogue now wishes she were dead. Rogue just glares at Bobby cause she can't glare at the Cajun at the moment and she wouldn't be here if it weren't for Bobby.  
  
Bobby just shrugs and says, "As I recall you wanted to do this."  
  
"Yah well it was the lesser of two evils"  
  
"Remy is not evil."  
  
"Yes he is just insane mad"  
  
"Non, cherie Remy is insane and happy."  
  
"Oh and that is so much better. Can we get on with this so called plahn of your Bobby?"  
  
"Well if you two would listen for two minutes."  
  
"We are listening." Rogue mutters it's not like she could be anywhere else at the moment.  
  
"Fine the plan is the plan."  
  
"What." Rogue and Remy say together.  
  
"That was like so cute."  
  
"And what is she still doing here."  
  
"Might need her later." Bobby replies.  
  
"So what is the plan that is tha plan."  
  
"Cherie Remy thinks you are getting a little too technical for him."  
  
"Why? Remy don't have tha brain capacity, with all his ego filling up the room, in his petite head."  
  
"Will you two shut up!"  
  
"Okay already." Rogue mutters.  
  
"Remy thinks Bobby looks like one of those cartoon people with steam coming out of his ears."  
  
"That can't be. I think he might sprout Popsicle's, though or maybe icicles. That would be a sight. Hey I like orange the best."  
  
"Remy like the red."  
  
"Oh, I wonder why that is and sugar I think the red your talking about is pink."  
  
"Non, Remy likes red."  
  
"Pink."  
  
"Red."  
  
"Will you two stop that! I swear you're like an old married couple. If your not fighting with each other you gang up on me!"  
  
"AH DO NOT LIKE THE CAJUN!"  
  
"Cherie Remy thinks you do."  
  
"And why would Remy think that."  
  
"Because Remy still have you in his lap."  
  
"A technical difficulty which I will fix soon."  
  
"Sure cherie."  
  
"Shut up! The both of you I want to tell you the plan."  
  
"Why?"  
  
"So we can get the professor for making us go in training sessions with Logan."  
  
"So what is tha plan?"  
  
"Well if you would let me tell you the plan you might figure it out."  
  
"Well if you would stop stalling and tell us the plan then we would already know the plan and why do we always refer to it as the plan"  
  
"Because if it had a name then it wouldn't be a plan."  
  
"So in other words ice boy couldn't think of a better name for it just like his code names."  
  
"Shut up!"  
  
"But whay"  
  
"Oui, Remy wants to know why too."  
  
"So I can tell you what you are supposed to do."  
  
"Fahne tell us what were supposed to do."  
  
"Get everyone into the main room and Remy tell the professor he has a surprise waiting."  
  
"And how will he now know what we are planning. Oh yah cause yah don't even know what we are planning."  
  
"Fine, Fine the plan is a secret you'll find out soon enough."  
  
"Mon ami Remy thinks you fell on your head one to many times."  
  
"Yah ah half tah agree on that one."  
  
"Well I don't give a damn what you think. Are you going to help or not?"  
  
"Yah fahne ah will."  
  
"Oui."  
  
"Okay everyone understand what they half to do."  
  
"Yah but ah don't know one thang. How are yall gonna keep this a secret from the professor. He's a telepath for crying out loud."  
  
"Simple, You and Remy already have shield in place to block your minds and well Jean is going to help me with mine. See I think of everything."  
  
"Wait a minute ice cube. Why is Jean helping you shield your mind from the professor? She would never be caught dead in something like this."  
  
"I have my ways"  
  
"Remy thinks he wants to know how."  
  
"Yah spill Drake"  
  
"So young so naive I will never tell, well maybe when you get older"  
  
"Ah'm older than ya are so tell me."  
  
"No."  
  
"Ah wasn't askin."  
  
"Remy thinks you should do as Roguey says even Remy not that stupid as to say no to Rogue when she look like that."  
  
"So if I tell you to leave you'll leave?"  
  
"Non, Remy knows that was a question and Remy also know that you really don't want him to leave."  
  
"Well Remy be wrong. And don't think I've forgotten about you drake. Drake . . . Drake. Drake you're a dead man."  
  
"Remy thinks you should let the man have the last few hours of freedom before you kill the boy. N'est pas."  
  
"Rogue thinks you better stop talking before I rip you tongue out."  
  
"Remy can think of a few things better than that to do with his tongue." And winks at Rogue.  
  
Rogue once again starts struggling she can't take this anylonger she is going to get awauy from the Cajun one way or another. "Let me go Cajun."  
  
"As you wish ma cherie."  
  
Rogue goes flying ahead and just as she is going to hit a chair Remy catches her.  
  
"Why do I feel like this has been happening a lot lately." Rogue mumbles.  
  
Remy sets her on her feet Rogue turns around and glares at him and starts walking out of the rec. room.  
  
"Hey like Rogue where are you going?"  
  
"Ah'm leaving."  
  
"Can I like come too."  
  
"Yah whatever kit."  
  
"Can we like go to the mall."  
  
"NO!"  
  
"Somebody's mad could it have anything to do with a handsome Cajun."  
  
"If you talk about him you die." There was no humour in her voice Kitty knew she meant it  
  
"So what are we going to do then."  
  
"Plot revenge on Bobby."  
  
"Oh like okay then." After Kitty got one of Bobby's better jokes this morning she decides to join in. She could never play too many pranks on Bobby.  
  
"And get Jean will you I think we can use her too." 


	4. the professors suprise

Disclaimer: I own nothing. I don't think this saying will ever change either.  
  
Lets skip ahead a bit because I'm lazy and well I haven't thought the plot that well through to come up with what happens next so this is the whole Bobby scene where he tricks the professor with the help of Jean. Hee hee goodie Jean helping.  
  
**  
  
Everyone was in the main hall wondering what was going on. They would soon find out. The professor wheeled in alongside Rogue and Remy and they weren't fighting. That was a surprise.  
  
"What is all the commotion about. I have some very urgent business to attend to." The professor explains  
  
Yahre a telepath and yah can't even figure out the trick Bobby is playing on yah. Professor you have lost your touch.  
  
"I like though you knew?" Kitty said  
  
"Vhat is going on and vhere is Bobby?" Kurt asks beginning to understand.  
  
"I like don't like this."  
  
"Makes two of us." Rogue mutters under her breath.  
  
"Rogue would you care to explain?" Xavier replies  
  
"Not really."  
  
"Rogue I would like an explanation." Xavier sternly asserts.  
  
"Remy."  
  
"Cherie Remy's not getting you out of this one."  
  
"Well thanks a lot."  
  
That's when you hear Bobby laughing evilly sliding down the hallway on one of his ice slides. He made a mess that he will have to clean up. Well a couple actually.  
  
"Ah think all your questions will be answered soon Prof."  
  
"Bobby what are you doing?" Xavier announces.  
  
"Well you see I was wondering what you would look like with hair and you know well I though that it would be really cool to give you some and well Logan's not here to rip me to shreds and ..."  
  
"Bobby get tah the point sugar."  
  
"Remy wants to know why you never call him sugar."  
  
"Not now swamp rat."  
  
"You would think they would stop talking for my big moment but nooo."  
  
Then Bobby takes aim right atop Xavier's bald head and wham you can now see a bright blue (well ice color) frozen wig on Xavier's head. It looked like Krusty the Clown gone horribly wrong. Everyone was in a state of shock for about two second and then they all burst out laughing. Even Rogue and Remy joined in they had never seen something so ridiculous in all their lives. Picture it the professor with clown hair.  
  
"And that ladies and gentlemen should go down in the Guinness Book of World Records. The first trick ever played on a bald telepath." Bobby announces cheerfully  
  
Just then Logan walks in and sees the professor. "Sorry chuck your on your own my nigh off remember." And with that said Wolverine walks right back out the door. Sometimes you just had to let things take their course. He really hoped somebody got a picture of that though.  
  
"Ah think that was a little dramatic from all tha talking yah did about the plan Bobby. Yah could have at least played a better trick."  
  
"You think of something better and as I remember correctly you were also laughing. Maybe I should have used a whoopee cushion or some green goop."  
  
"All Ah'm saying is that you talk a lot for some minor trick."  
  
"You try to pull one over on a telepath and then tell me that I did a bad job."  
  
"That reminds me Bobby," Xavier states, "how did you manage to block your mind from me?"  
  
"Trade secret can't give away the details." But while Bobby says this he looks fixedly at Jean.  
  
"Well he may not be able to tell yah but I can prof. It was Jean."  
  
"Like he couldn't figure that out Rogue."  
  
"Just stating the obvious just in case someone from the peanut gallery didn't get the note."  
  
"I am not a peanut." Jamie whines  
  
"Not yah sugar." Rogue then ruffles his hair.  
  
"Well then Rogue who is the peanut gallery?" Jamie queries.  
  
"Yah know I have no idea."  
  
"Remy can tell you it ain't him."  
  
"Cajun not that kind of peanut."  
  
"But Remy just stating a fact cherie."  
  
"Nawt this again Ah am going to bed."  
  
"Can Remy come."  
  
"Non, and Ah know yah can understand that because it's in yahre language."  
  
"Je ne sais pas. Je ne comprende belle femmes." (I don't know. I don't understand beautiful women.  
  
"Oh Kitty would yah like to have a Cajun in our room all night long?"  
  
"Like it doesn't matter to me. I'm like going out with Kurt and I could probably crash there. So, why don't you like have some fun."  
  
"Remy thinks your plan just backfired, cherie."  
  
"If yah can't understand me then why are yah still talking tah me?"  
  
"Remy has no idea."  
  
"Remy also has nawt one brain cell."  
  
"Remy has brains."  
  
"Well yah don't use them do you or is all that ego taking up too much room!"  
  
With that said Rogue marches past Bobby and the Professor up to her room. But as soon as she sets foot on one of the stair she trips on one of Bobby's patches of ice and hits her head on the ground. Remy is by her side in an instant. "Cherie, Cherie are you alright? Talk to Remy."  
  
"Remy if you would please take Rogue down to the Med. Lab. I will be down there shortly. Bobby I would like to talk to you later."  
  
**  
  
And this is where I go fishing. I don't know about the next chapter. So, if anyone wants to take over this you are welcome to do so. I have lots of ideas just not for this story so I don't know if I will update again, sorry and the humor kinda, okay really sucks so I don't know what I am going to do. I really tried with the frozen clown hair but I couldn't introduce it right.  
  
Also, If anyone could help me write Remy and Rogues accents better that would be much appreciated. 


End file.
